Capitalism for Dummies

So, we are in a hung parliament. Just b-e-a-yootiful. Clegg (sorry) is going to talk to Cameron or Brown (who should be Crown just to complete a set and sound more arrogant towards royalty) to form a coalition on the off chance the original cant go through or it can go throughin the coalition or without it so that... PARADOX:

And yes, I am using that picture in my happy philosophical blog as well, because I have nothing else to talk about. If I can be arsed to update [re]thinkism.

No, the hung parliament situation is not a paradox, or even that complicated. It just involves alot of rules that people are only aware of if your part of parliament, or have made those rules, and the people making those rules happen to be in parliament. In short, nothing will get done for the next 1000 years of darkness of pseudo-anarchy and angry post twat tories punching Harriet Harman for another bitchy comment (and yes, I have no fucking clue how to spell Harman, Harmon... is Harmon a jamaican harriet?).

Anyway, enough with politics. If ya wanna know more read up about is seriously, or on blogs, or twitter. Even the BBC go with that shizzle now.

My point for today is this.

Apparently this website believes that a new religion is being set up by twilight fans: Cullenism.

"These Cullenists believe "[j]ust like any other religion," that there is some spirituality to be had in the Twilight series, forming rules and principles upon which to base their tenets. Their creed, say the Cullenists, includes a base set of beliefs that "Edward and the rest of the Twilight characters are real," that "[t]he Twilight series should be worshipped," and that "[i]f you are good in life, you will be bless[ed] with eternity with the Cullens." Other than that, say the Cullenists, there "is not a limit to what you can believe in when it comes to the Cullenism religion . . . we will accept any other Cullenism beliefs you may have." Cullenists are also expected to read some of the books on a daily basis, "like the Bible" and make a pilgrimage to Forks."

The website doesn't actually say where they got this quote from, and if you search for it the quote appears to be solely quoted from here. I sense fake media. We all jest that the idiots of that fan-loaded Mary Sue of an arsewipe of a poor excuse for a novel or toilet paper or a pebble or ya mom or Carpe Noctem or Grasshopper or shitheap or pile of decapitated monkey brains on rye... ... ... has caused a new religion for wannabe-emos (which sounds as sad as the scene scene or this following image:)

I dont think this is entirely true. Namely due to the absense of facts. I like facts. They're awesome. Facts like Gordon Brown is Gay and the Queen has always enjoyed handcuffs. 

"It is one thing, in our fandom of the series, the film, its cast, etcetera, to spend inordinate amount of time, say the fans, on reading, re-reading, discussing, and watching things about the series, but it is a whole other to devote the core of one's faith to a set of fictional books and films, don't you think?"

I think spending any amount of time on Twilight makes you a twat. I, therefore, am I twat for I have written about it, ranted about and once read some pages of it, giggled histerically at the grammar usage and they promptly told a load of girls they had the IQ of a barrell of histerectomies. Twilight has systematically capitalised Dracula and his hordes of the damned. A truly horrible incarnation of fear has been transformed, transmuted, into pure greedy money. Stephanie "Mary Sue I like money and hate grammar" Meyer has grabbed emos, scene kids and the general public, drained them of dignity and cash, and now lives in a sky castle pissing on the people below her. Below her literally, not metaphorically, for everyone, even Hitler, has greater morals. All Hitler wanted to do is take peoples souls away forever, not ask them for money first so he could do so. 

I detest Twilight and all it stands for. Its like a bank loan for teenagers, inevitably taking more than it gives. Its how society works nowadays.

That rant got a bit philosophical, heres another picture:

 I want to be him. Piano playing dickhead (haha, dickhead, in jokes I love them). 

But, back to the money again. If you want to show people where your cash, hopes, dreams and reputation goes, you can now join Blippy.

Blippy is like twitter but for shit economists. Want to tell ya friend what book ya bought, but too fucking lazy to do so, get Blippy to update your facebook and twitter for you. How sad is that. people dont even have to tell each other what they bought anymore, a website can do that for you. If youve bought a birthday present, tell everyone what it is. No need for surprises anymore, social interaction beats surprise, excitement and a life anyday.

So yeah, if you want to have no need to leave the house again, join Blippy, and watch your dignity slip away (Y).